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Friday, August 15, 2008

New Dictionary Words!

Abstract: Summary or condensed version of a study that provides a Cliff-Notes version for researchers who haven't the time and for audiences who haven't a clue.
Barnum Affect: Individual acceptance of vague and generalized versions of personality as an accurate reflection of their own personality. An affect used to effect by circus (P.T. Barnum), psychological (Dr. Phil), and advertising ringmasters.
Bi-Polar Disorder: An extreme elevation in mood due to extreme elevation in latitude. Common among arctic explorers.
Existential Anxiety: Refers to anxiety about finding one's place in the world, in line, or trying to find where one placed one's car keys.
General Adaptation Syndrome (GAS): The body's generalized attempt to defend itself against flatulence.
Scientific Method: Research strategy by which a person identifies a problem, creates hypotheses, develops predictions, and tests them through the collection and analysis of data. Normally followed by the groveling method, where one vainly tries to convince one's peers to recognize the problem and one's hypothesis, prediction, and tests.(see Galileo).
Self-depreciation: To devalue oneself, one's body or part of it. Usually instigated by an appreciation of TV shows, video games, and doughnuts.
Yoga: The science of stretching to feel better. Trademarked 3,000 years ago by some Indian gurus, which is a stretch.
Schema: A cognitive structure utilized to make sense of the world.When a psychologist tries to sell it to you, this is called a scheme.
Sympathetic Nervous System: Part of the autonomic nervous system that controls emotional responses to news of home foreclosures, forest fires, and kittens stuck in trees.
Hard Wired: Tiny little, yet hard wires that causes us to like sex, be afraid of spiders, and prefer vanilla ice cream. Hard wires are an essential ingredient for our behavior that dispenses with the need for hard thinking.
Fixation: Psychological disorder, common among housewives, that forces them to incessantly drive their spouses to fix sinks, roofs, fences, and other assorted objects.
Episodic Memory: The uncanny ability to remember selected TV episodes in months or years past.

1 comment:

david said...

Very good articles...